The title of tonight's episode of American Horror Story: Coven is "Go to Hell," and the hour is aptly named for sure. When we last saw the witches, Fiona and Marie took down the Delphi dudes, Stupid Cordelia re-blinded herself, Madison dumped Misty in a mausoleum, crazy ass Myrtle sent Zoe and Kyle on a bus to Orlando (good riddance), Madam LaLaurie literally became whole, and Precious Queenie returned to Miss Robichaux's. Here's where we are tonight:
Which Witch is Which?
In order to become the next Supreme, that individual has to master the seven wonders of witchcraft: telekinesis, concilium (mind control), transmutation, divination (my brain immediately went to Harry Potter), vitalum vitalis (resurrection), descensum (traveling between worlds), and pyrokinesis. Since none of these feats includes having a toxic vagina, I assume Zoe is out of the running...which is fine. I hope she enjoys Disneyworld.
Hysterical Blindness
Stupid Cordelia approaches Madison. She's looking for Misty, has touched all of Misty's belongings, but she still can't seem to "see" her. By grabbing Madison's shoulder, Cordelia begins to believe that she gouged her eyes out for no good effing reason. Way to go.
Later on in the day Fiona tries to bond with her daughter (again?). She's just had the finishing touches put on her portrait, which will hang near the paintings of the Supremes that have come before her. She feels she only has a couple of weeks left and wants to say "goodbye." Fiona explains that once you have a power it never goes away...that the second sight will always be a part of Codelia. She just has to find it. Fiona then gives Cordelia her mother's necklace and they share a tender moment. Suddently...Cordelia's visions return. She sees Madison with a freshly slit throat on the stairwell, Zoe impaled against a wall, Misty dead on top of the piano, Precious Queenie with a stake through her mouth in a puddle of blood on the floor, and finally Cordelia sees herself with a bullet in her forehead. In this vision Fiona snatches the necklace off of Cordelia's body...
Cordelia's returned visions lead her to visit The Axeman. She tells him that after Fiona kills the witches she will leave him behind. Cordelia "saw" Fiona with a passport and a plane ticket which leaves two days from now. Funny that she never told The Axeman of the trip. He starts to sweat, he breathes heavy...he's pisssssed.
Returning to Ms. Robichaux's, Cordelia is on a roll. She tries to find Misty again and has luck this time while smelling Misty's clothes. That's kind of creepy but we'll go with it. She brings Precious Queenie with her to the cemetery and the voodoo witch uses telekinesis to get Misty out of the mausoleum. Misty is dead but no matter - Precious Queenie brings her back to life. Yay!
Chicken Fried Scheming
While we are on the topic of missing persons, Precious Queenie is now on a mission to locate Marie. Using descensum, she finds Papa Legba who still looks just as creepy as ever. They meet at Precious Queenie's former workplace, Chubbie's, where she tries to get some information about Marie. Papa Legba isn't helpful. He simply encourages Precious Queenie to get back to where she came from before the sun comes up. She tells him she's only been there 5 minutes, but he replies "time moves differently in hell."
When Precious Queenie awakens, Papa Legba is sitting next to her bed. While cocaine kept him chatting with Fiona, he apparently only needs hot chocolate with marshmallows to hang out with Precious Queenie. Interesting. She finds out that Madam LaLaurie cut Marie into a bunch of pieces and scattered them all over the city. Ha! Precious Queenie wants them both gone and Papa tells her that Madam LaLaurie cannot be killed while Marie lives (wait - did we already know that and I missed it?). The young witch counters by saying Marie can't very well hold up her end of the bargain while she's distributed throughout New Orleans. He seems intrigued by this...
Make Me Over
Madam LaLaurie has found herself a new look and a new gig. After taking a tour of her former house and realizing all of the things (mostly true) being said about her, Madam LaLaurie takes it upon herself to lure the tour guide to the attic. She then clobbers her over the head and puts her in one of the cages....nothing says "help wanted" like a sudden disappearance. When she gives her own tours Madame LaLaurie touts her charitable work and equestrian abilities. The tourists want to hear about the killings and see the torture room. She tells the group they've been hearing lies...and that Madam LaLaurie was a visionary ahead of her time.
Welcome Home?
Myrtle and Madison trade insults regarding Misty's impending arrival. When the door opens, however, it's Zoe and Kyle (groan) and not Misty. Seems they did make it to Florida and greatly enjoyed the sunshine. At one point they were picnicking near a tree with smiles on their faces, but a homeless man arrived and said they were in his spot. He went a little overboard...so of course Kyle killed him. Zoe resurrected the man and now thinks she's the next Supreme. Sigh.
My eye-rolling ends when Misty arrives a few moments later. She starts beating the shit out of Madison immediately and I finally have something to be excited about. Kyle begins to break up the fight just as the newly heartbroken Axeman walks in. He begins to wield his weapon, but the witches collectively send him flying against the staircase. As he tries to get up they notice he is covered in blood....but not his. Cordelia uses her vision to determine the blood is Fiona's.
We flash back to earlier in the day. Fiona arrives at The Axeman's apartment not too long after Cordelia's visit. Fiona is interested in The Axeman's...instrument...but The Axeman is interested in the truth. Fiona comes clean to an extent. She'll definitely miss him. But when the next Supreme is dead she will have 30 years of vitality until the next one comes along. Fiona turns her back to The Axeman, lighting a cigarette as she explains that their relationship was never going to work. He grabs the back of her head and throws her on the bed. He tells Fiona that he knows she loves him, but she rubs salt in his wound by saying she was sick and just needed to feel something. The Axeman kisses her but she pushes him away. Fiona walks over to the counter and pours herself a drink. The camera is in close up mode on her profile. She says she's never been interested in love - she's always been two steps ahead of heartbreak. Fiona starts to speak again but an axe comes down in her back. Then again. And again. Actually...several more times...and we say "goodbye" to our Supreme. Holy shit...
"Holy shit," says Madison. "So, she's really gone." Cordelia tells the group that The Axeman fed Fiona to the alligators in the swamp, which is beyond anyone's power of resurrection. The witches and Kyle (why is he still here?) argue over who will kill The Axeman. Madison picks up the weapon and hacks into the guy. The rest of the witches use telekinesis to grab knives from the kitchen and then everyone takes a stab (so to speak) at the jazzy killer. It's bloody. It's gross. But I'm not sure what else I would have expected given the torturous scenes we have already witnessed this season.
My Own Personal Hell
The final 7 minutes are spent in what looks like a flashback of Madam LaLaurie's plantation. I breathe a sigh of relief because I didn't want her character to be finished just yet. Her slaves have thrown her into one of the cages in the attic. She looks over at her daughter in a neighboring cage and sobs with regret. Her remaining family members surround her as well and Marie appears, gloating at this sight. She stabs Madam LaLaurie and sends a cup of her blood to the thirsty daughter in the neighboring cage. Seems she's ready for some torturing...
However, just as Marie is about to brand the daughter with a hot poker, she shakes and looks unfamiliar with her surroundings. "How did I get here? No, I don't want to do this! This girl has done nothing to me." We hear Papa Legba's voice and know this isn't a flashback. He tells Madam LaLaurie she has been released from the mortal world but as punishment for her crimes, she will spend all eternity here....in hell. And Marie? She doesn't understand. She helped and protected so many people during her stint as an immortal. Papa Legba reminds her that she delivered innocent babies to him every year. Her punishment is to remain in the attic as well...as the LaLaurie family torturer.
Next week is the season finale of AHS Coven and we will finally find out who the next Supreme is. All of the witches will take the seven wonders challenge and I imagine not all of them will come out alive....or alive again depending on who we're talking about. Who will it be? Precious Queenie's powers received a lot of attention this episode with Madison and Zoe showing signs of advanced magic as well. And really, when the season started Zoe was definitely the focal point. It wouldn't surprised me if she was the chosen one after all. Misty is still my favorite though, especially after the way she beat the shit out Madison tonight. However, Cordelia's sudden confidence and leadership might put her above the rest in the long run.
As for the dearly departed, I think we knew Fiona would meet her end one way or another, but I thought the witches would be the ones to slay the Supreme. I'll admit that I didn't see tonight's brutal murder coming, but I thought it was fitting. She may never have loved The Axeman, but Fiona was silly enough to think his love for her would allow her to do and say whatever she wanted. The Axeman, in turn, had been taken down by a group of young witches before...so I think it was only appropriate for him to meet his end the way he did tonight.
Really though, I will miss Marie and Madam LaLaurie far more than the deceased lovebirds. I thought Kathy Bates and Angela Bassett were phenomenal this season, and I had really hoped their characters would go on hating each other forever...maybe in a Death Becomes Her kind of way. If you haven't seen that movie, you have a huge void in your life to fill. Anyway, I'm eager for next week's finale and excited to see who survives the season. All will be revealed soon!
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