TWD Season 8 Episode 6: The King, The Widow, and Rick

Tonight's episode of The Walking Dead circled back with just about everybody in the Grimes gang as our heroes try to figure out the next steps to defeat The Saviors. Losing Ezekiel's entire army was never part of the plan, so it's time to regroup and check in on everyone...even if they are not making good decisions. There are no major deaths in this hour and some characters that have been long overdue for screen time finally get their chance. Here's what went down in "The King, The Widow, and Rick."

Signed, Sealed, Delivered

The episode opens with Maggie, Rick, and Carol all reading letters from one another regarding the state of things in their locations. Word is traveling very quickly for a land of no phones or email. Maybe Ezekiel also has some connections with the owls from Harry Potter. Anyway, even though The Kingdom's warriors are finished, Ezekiel won't face any of his people, and Hilltop has a hostage situation and Dumbass Gregory issues to deal with, Rick says the plan is working and they must move forward. He makes no mention of the helicopter. At all. 

Rick's next stop is garbageland where Das Sound Machine Jadis and a few of others are doing metal work in the nude, as people often do. For a second I'm hoping that "Unchained Melody" would play and Rick would sneak up behind Jadis and help her, but the man on a mission has no time for pleasantries. Rick arrives and talks about making another deal (because it worked so well last time) and he shows Jadis the polaroid pictures of The Sanctuary and outposts in shambles. It's another one of those "do this or you and your people will end up dead" sort of speeches and Jadis is having none of it. She gives him a simple "no" and has him locked up...in the nude. I have to laugh when she says. "He talks to much." Indeed...sometimes less is more. 

The last time we see Rick in this episode, he is a captive in a dumpster/cell. Jadis writes a big letter "A" in chalk on the outside, much like the Terminus captive facilities. Huh? Were the garbage people once affiliated with Terminus? Are they cannibals? Is that why they're not concerned about maintaining fresh food in a dump? Are they looking to have a Rick Rump Roast? Ramen Rick? Rick Risotto? I could go on (I'd like to) but I won't.

You've Got The Future In Your Hand

Maggie has quite the stressful situation on her hands at Hilltop. I think Aaron showing up with baby Gracie is well timed for Maggie's nerves...and to remind us that Maggie is pregnant because she still doesn't look like she is. Maggie has temporarily allowed the Savior prisoners to sit just outside the gates at gunpoint while she figures out what to do with them. She finds Jesus feeding them part of the turnip supply (which Jesus says is excess) and somehow Dumbass Gregory is right by her side. He suggests building a gallows for these guys instead of protecting them and Maggie shoos him away. She's not happy with the situation Jesus has put them in and he tells her that when all is said and done "we have to make sure what's left is worth what we lost."

That night the prisoners hear some construction going on inside the gates and they assume Maggie has decided on hanging them instead of feeding them. Jesus tells them not to worry and one Savior in particular, Dillon, is super chatty and friendly. He's also kinda dreamy. Dillon mentions that the Saviors asked him to help build a fence and now he's sitting against one waiting to die and Jesus says no one is innocent. Could love be in the air here? I'm still hoping for an Aaron romance but this exchange has been very interesting. 

When morning comes and Enid beckons for Jesus to bring the prisoners inside the walls, Jesus looks worried. Maggie hasn't built gallows - she's built a holding pen for these guys. She tells Jesus that she may need these prisoners to trade to the Saviors in case some of their people get captured. She's not guaranteeing she will let them all live, but for now they are going to be taken care of under lock and key as long as they cooperate. Dumbass Gregory is livid and tells Maggie she can't let people they can't trust run around inside the walls. Maggie agrees....and she has Gregory thrown in with the prisoners. HA! That's fantastic. This is all still a lot for Aaron and his grief though, and he takes off on a side mission (not part of Rick's plan that he says is working) that isn't really explained, and he lets Enid go with him.  

Not Ashamed To Cry

The community members of The Kingdom are deep in grief. Ezekiel will not come out of his throne room, even when Carol bangs on the door and says they need to gather everyone who can fight. Are there still people there who can fight other than her and Jerry? Young Henry is nearby doing his best Morgan impression with a stick (where is Morgan?), and he tells Carol he wants to go with her and help. She shuts him down immediately, just like she did with Benjamin. Similarly, Carol finds Henry out in the woods by himself trying to take out Walkers. She scolds him, saying kids who wander around in the woods by themselves "never get seen again, and if they do, they're monsters." Awww. My brain just immediately went back to season 2 and Sophia's little Walker legs coming out of Hershel's barn. Henry just wants to be trained so he can avenge his brother's death, and Carol ultimately hands him a gun with the safety on and tells him to stay close as they make their way back to The Kingdom. 

Fun fact - the kid who plays Henry is Macsen Lintz...younger brother of Madison Lintz...who played Carol's daughter Sophia! Isn't that awesome? I've been thinking lately that this boy looks familiar, and it's pretty much because he and his sister have the same face. The fact that Carol looks at him and says what she did about kids becoming monsters is brilliant...and really sad all at the same time.

Carol and Henry arrive back in The Kingdom and Carol is ready to blow through the door of Ezekiel's throne room in order to finally get him to talk to her. Jerry tells her the door is unlocked and I laugh out loud. Carol enters the room and finds the king sitting slumped against his throne, holding onto Shiva's chain. He tells Carol he can't be a king anymore and says she needs to lead the people. He asks to be left alone and Carol turns to leave...then she turns back and asks Ezekiel why he came to visit her when she moved into the little house nearby. "You just make me feel real. Not fiction. Real." Carol tearfully tells Ezekiel that he is real to her and to The Kingdom and says his people need him. "And if you can't be 'the king,' then do what you do best and play the part." Ezekiel whispers... "I can't" and this bums me out.  Do it for Shiva!

I've Done A Lot Of Foolish Things

It's been quite a while since we've seen Michonne, one-eyed Carl, and Smokin' Hot Rosita, and we finally have some time with them this evening. Michonne is restless and wants to be part of the All Out War that seems to be happening without her. She takes Smokin' Hot Rosita and her resting bitch face on a mission to see The Sanctuary, which by the way is also NOT part of the plan Rick says is working. Both women are still healing from the big fight in Alexandria last season, so I'm not sure how this is a good idea...but what do I know? During their drive they hear opera music (you read that right) coming from the woods and they take a detour to check out the source. Turns out two Saviors in the midst of strapping a speaker to a truck to play loud music and lure the Walkers away from The Sanctuary. Well there you go, ladies! Just when you thought you were useless in this big plan.

Michonne and Smokin' Hot Rosita follow the Saviors into the random building they are using as a workshop, but they're a little rusty on this attack and kill thing. Michonne accidentally kicks a tennis ball, alerting the Saviors that they are not alone, and Rosita drops her pistol. Good grief. Eventually Rosita picks up a missile launcher and blows one of her enemies to pieces, but the noise distracts Michonne's fight with the other Savior and that bitch hops in the singing truck and takes off. 

Just as we think the truck is getting away, Daryl and Tara come speeding in with a garbage truck and crash through the Savior's vehicle. The speaker mission is destroyed and Daryl's interception game has been pretty amazing lately. His current attitude might be dangerous but at least he told Tara they could both kill Dwight when the war is over. Sharing is caring. The four friends regroup and head toward The Sanctuary, where it seems like Daryl is going rogue. He tells the ladies when they arrive that he's going to end this.  

I Went And Stayed Too Long

Meanwhile Carl and his inexplicable haircut are wandering through the woods (Carol's speech would never work on him anyway) and he finds the guy that was looking for food and water in the season premiere. You know, the guy Rick shot at but only over his head. Carl feels bad about what happened and he has brought this man, whose name is Siddiq, food and water. Carl also asks him the standard 3 questions people must answer before joining the Grimes gang. Turns out Siddiq has killed 237 Walkers and one person, but only because the person was attacked by Walkers but didn't die right away. Siddiq kills as many Walkers as he can because his mom told him that maybe killing the Walkers would free their souls. He says "you gotta honor your parents, right?" and Carl accurately points out that if he was honoring his dad, he wouldn't be there giving food and water to Siddiq. 

On their journey back to Alexandria, they have a close call while trying to put down some Walkers, and given Siddiq's combat tactics, I have no idea how he's survived so long by himself. Siddiq doesn't want to become a burden on Carl - after all, Rick didn't want anything to do with Siddiq, but Carl tells him, "sometimes kids have to find their own way to show their parents the way." Welp, Rick could sure use someone to show him the way out of garbageland right now. 

The look on their faces says it all. 

The episode ends with a shot of the "A" container holding Rick and while it seems like a lot happened in this hour, we're really not any further along in the war than we were at the end of last week. Or the week before. My biggest takeaway from the episode is Rick thinks shit is working, but somehow his people are participating in opposite day. Michonne and Rosita? No, don't stay and protect Alexandria like you're supposed to. Go to the Walker infested Sanctuary instead "just to see it." Daryl? No, don't take losing the dynamite as a deterrent for doing your own thing. Go rogue anyway and take revenge-driven Tara with you. Aaron? Though Maggie could really use your help right now, go ahead and leave Hilltop to do something that probably won't help given your right hand is Enid. And Carl? You should totally ditch Alexandria as well (poor Judith) and offer protection to a guy who likes to stop and kill every Walker he sees. Sigh. Going into the final 2 episodes of 2017, I'm wondering when what's happening in The Sanctuary and what's happening in the communities will all come together again. Will Daryl somehow blow a hole in The Sanctuary walls to let the Walkers inside the building? Will Ezekiel move past his "I'm no king" nonsense and lead his people? Is Jesus going to stop whining and be helpful? Is Morgan going to reemerge batshit crazy? And finally, who is going to save Rick from what I assume is a very smelly itty bitty living space? His reserves are all doing their own thing at the moment and obviously did not heed the messages in the Harry Potter owl mail.  

TWD Season 8 Episode 5: The Big Scary U

After last week's traumatic loss of Shiva the tiger, I'm going into tonight's episode of The Walking Dead looking for moments to celebrate. I really don't get any in this hour, but we do finally catch up with Father Gabriel, whom we haven't seen since Dumbass Gregory left him for dead in the season premiere. What's he been up to? How are the rest of our heroes progressing? Here's what went down in "The Big Scary U."

Give Me Another Chance

We flash back to The Sanctuary just prior to Rick and company showing up to shoot way too many precious bullets into the building. Simon is delivering breakfast to Dumbass Gregory, who is not necessarily living in luxury at Negan's compound, but he's certainly not living like a prisoner either. Simon is proud of Gregory for coming to see him when things started to get out of hand at Hilltop and he says today is the day Gregory will solve the problem. 

Dumbass Gregory sits down for a meeting with Negan and his lieutenants - Dwight (heh), Eugene, Gavin, Simon and Regina and he discusses what he calls "The Big Scary U," which he says is the unknown. Gregory doesn't like to kill people, but Negan assures him that sometimes killing 1 may save 100. "And that's what we do. We save people." Negan honestly believes this. Dwight is already bored and leaves to take a smoke break. Gregory promises Negan he can convince his people to abandon Maggie's crusade and then none of the Hilltop residents will have to die. Negan accuses Gregory of playing both sides, but Simon sticks up for him. Why Simon sticks up for him is beyond me. Simon suggests they back Gregory when he lays down the law, and if all doesn't go well..."we kill everyone there." Negan is pisssssed. He says people are the foundation of what they are trying to build. "Are you confused about who we are? Are you confused about who's in charge? Are we backsliding, Simon? Please. Tell me we're not backsliding." Eugene looks terrified and Dumbass Gregory may have just peed his pants. Negan doesn't like Simon's "Plan A." He says Plan A will be taking Rick, Maggie, and Ezekiel alive and killing them in a very public way. Negan doesn't completely finish his speech though because armored cars are arriving outside.

So Gone, So Wrong

Changing gears a bit, we join Rick and Daryl after they intercepted the weapons vehicle coming from one of the Saviors' satellite sites. Carol may not have been able to prevent the jeep from leaving the lot, but Rick and Daryl prevented it from getting far...in the midst of fighting, the vehicle crashed. Turns out the driver is still (barely) alive and Rick and Daryl question him about the chemical plant he just came from. The driver says everyone there is dead except some psycho lady and the boys immediately know he's referencing Carol. Then he dies. 

Rick and Daryl start unloading the Saviors' jeep and come across quite a bit of dynamite. Daryl suggests using it to blow a hole in the walls of The Sanctuary (not sure how he thinks he will make it to the wall), telling Rick the people in there will either surrender or die at that point. Rick doesn't want to put the workers and families at risk but Daryl isn't looking for Rick's approval. He says he will take the dynamite to The Sanctuary anyway. The two get into a fistfight and Rick tosses the bag of dynamite at the crashed jeep...everything blows up and they lose all of the weapons that would have been helpful. Rick's own jeep won't start at this point either, but Daryl leaves him behind to walk back to wherever they were going. What a freaking waste. This whole exchange reminds me of the day they met Jesus and wasted a whole bunch of time with bullshit rather than get the supply truck back to Alexandria as quickly as possible. 

We see a super exhausted Rick making his way on foot slowly but surely down a path in the woods. He's stopped in his tracks by an odd sound. Walkers? A truck? The Saviors with more weapons? Rick looks up and sees a helicopter flying over head. A HELICOPTER flying over head! Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaat?!? The helicopter must not have seen Rick because it keeps on going, and Rick makes no attempt to try to flag it down. He'd probably attract a shit ton of Walkers in the process anyway. We don't find out where the helicopter came from in this hour, but I sure do hope the show runners don't put this little gem on the back-burner for several episodes to come. 

These Are My Confessions

In another scene pre-Sanctuary mission, Gabriel prays in his church in preparation for battle. He says he does not fear death, but he does fear "a fruitless death." All he asks God for at this moment is a purpose. 

We now catch up with Gabriel and Negan in the trailer, trapped together as a herd of Walkers bangs on the walls from outside. Negan tells Gabriel that Rick is an asshole who is going to get a lot of people killed. Negan says that even though he killed Glenn and Abraham, he's "not the one who got them killed." Kind of a fair point, especially considering Negan believes his kills are for the greater good of everyone else. He asks Gabriel why on earth he'd risk his life for Dumbass Gregory and Gabriel mentions that he does not want to die a fruitless death. He thinks that his purpose might be right there in the trailer with Negan. "I think I'm here to take your confession." 

Negan says he doesn't have shit to confess and asks Gabriel why he became a priest. "I love God and I love people. I wanted to bring them together...to help people through their difficult times...to help them through their weaknesses." Negan smiles and says he himself has been helping people through their weaknesses his whole life. He briefly mentions that he used to work with kids (wish we could get more on that) and tells Gabriel that people are going to start dying inside The Sanctuary because he's not there to stop it. He says he makes his people strong which makes this world strong. Negan calls Gabriel his new special project. "I'm gonna make you nice and strong too. Gonna find your special purpose. Hell yes we are." 

If I'm Gonna Tell It Then I Gotta Tell It All

The Walkers are starting to bust in now and Gabriel makes another play for Negan's confession. He says Negan has killed innocent people, but Negan maintains he didn't kill anyone who didn't deserve it. Gabriel says Negan treats the workers like slaves, but Negan says it's an economy where some people win and some people lose...but none of them are going hungry. Gabriel brings up the women Negan has pressured to be his wives, and Negan's face changes. He says each lady made their own choice, but I think he knows Gabriel's got him on this one. 

The trailer is starting to fall apart and Negan suggests the ole Walker guts ensemble to get them into the compound. He doesn't want to kill Gabriel - he wants Gabriel to work with him. Gabriel chooses this moment to confesses to Negan that he locked his congregation out of the church when the apocalypse hit. "I failed them. I failed God. And every day I work to lessen that failure. To be of service and purpose. Now I offer you the assurance of a pardon, penance, and absolution. I will go with you. I will show you that working together as equals is the only true way to grace." Negan then confesses that he did have a first wife - a real wife before the world went to hell in a hand-basket. He says he cheated on his wife, even when she was sick. She finally passed away when the Walkers started dominating the area and Negan couldn't bear to put her down. "That is how I was weak. That is what I will confess." Gabriel tells him he is forgiven and they prepare for escape. 

As Negan begins tearing up Walker parts, he asks Gabriel if anyone he knows has ever gotten sick from dousing themselves with guts and Gabriel's only response is "We're from Georgia." Ha!  They lather up and walk slowly through the herd, but we all know that this plan has often backfired. The Walkers do attack and the guys have to fight their way into the building. 

Be A Man And Get It Over With

Negan's lieutenants resume their meeting after getting back inside the compound safely. They argue over the next course of action, hoping to get a group out of the compound to go get help, not realizing that their 3 outposts have also been compromised. Gavin wants to focus the conversation on how Rick and company knew the outpost leaders would all be in a meeting with Negan today. He's looking to Eugene. So is Simon. Dwight jumps in and takes control, saying he'll lead the Saviors out of the compound safely, and somehow the meeting temporarily ends. Eugene goes to Dwight's room and thanks him for his support, but I didn't hear any kind of plan come out of the discussion. 

The lieutenants meet again and this time the workers are outside the door and restless. They want to know where Negan is, when they are going to get more rations, and what the plan is for getting everyone to safety. There are a whole lot of workers and not a lot of lieutenants. Simon acts like a total dick, Dwight tries to calm the crowd, and Regina puts a bullet in one of the loudest workers. Just then they hear Negan come around the corner with Gabriel. Everyone kneels including Gabriel, and the priest is dismayed as the workers yell things like "Thank you, Negan. Thank God for you."

Negan showers and meets with his lieutenants, most of whom still say a rat is living among them. Negan pulls Eugene aside and tells him he needs to find a way to solve the problem outside. If he succeeds, Negan will make him a happy man. If he does not, Negan will kill him quickly so Eugene won't have to witness what happens when the compound runs out of food and water. Eugene  continues to look terrified and goes to visit Gabriel and give him a warm welcome. He finds Gabriel leaning against the wall in his room/cell, sweating and sick. Eugene wants to go grab Dr. Carson and Gabriel is barely able to say, "Dr. Carson is Maggie's doctor. We have to get him out of here."

The episode ends there, as does the first episode of Season 8 without a ton of action-packed scenes (which I am totally fine with). There are many cliffhangers going into next week though. What's the deal with the helicopter? Where did it come from? Who's flying it? It can't be connected to the Saviors or the lieutenants would have thrown that escape idea out to the group. Does Eugene know Dwight is Rick's inside man? Is Eugene somehow in cahoots as well? What's happening with Gabriel? Was he bit or did the tainted Walker guts make him sick? He may very well have served his "purpose" at this point but I'd hate to see him go. Gabriel is one character that I never thought would grow on me, but now that TWD has introduced people like Dumbass Gregory, Gabe is definitely on my good side.

TWD Season 8 Episode 4: Some Guy

Overall things seemed to be going well for our heroes in their kick-off of the All Out War against the Saviors. With some losses here and there, the Alexandria/Hilltop/Kingdom trifecta was unstoppable for a while, but all good things must come to an end. Tonight on The Walking Dead the losses are far more severe, and morale is shattered for what's left of one of our groups. I'll say that my morale is also low after the season's fourth episode. Who is able to survive this sad hour? Here's what went down in "Some Guy." 

Times Are Gone For Honest Men
The episode opens with King Ezekiel preparing his group to go on the mission we've been watching these past few weeks. We see the both the men and women warriors saying goodbye to their spouses and children, and we see a less flashy version of Ezekiel become "king" as he completes his hair and wardrobe for the day ahead. As he watches the folks in The Kingdom pack up the trucks and suit up, he does not resemble the "we will lose not one of our ranks" confident leader that has been making Carol smile. He looks uncertain as he begins to head out of his home.

With Shiva by his side, Ezekiel marches toward his army, stopping to tell Henry (Benjamin's little brother) to be brave in their absence. He then addresses the crowd: "We will fight. We will bleed. And yet I smile." The speech continues and the troops are definitely rallied to defeat the Saviors and find the glory their king has promised them. "You trust the King. We will win! I smile. I laugh. I rejoice this day. For on this day we are joined in purpose and vision. We are a singular heart and mind. On this day, we are ONE!" The crowd goes into a massive group hug with Ezekiel, and hell, even I'm inspired by this display of teamwork. 

The Sun In My Disgrace

But now we catch up with the warriors of The Kingdom where we left them last week. After believing they had come through the battle at one of Negan's satellite sites unscathed, Saviors in upper levels of the building opened fire. The group hug has become a group pile of dead bodies, with Ezekiel surviving thanks to the number of followers who threw themselves in front of gunfire for him. He climbs out from under the casualties and realizes he's the only one alive. His smile is gone. My first thought is, "get the hell out of there before all of those people turn!" And then I wonder, where is Carol? And then we see all of those people turn and I forget about Carol. Ezekiel, cry later. Right now GTFO! The king is nearly devoured by his own ranks...all of which he lost...and he has to start shooting them all in the head, which has to be (figuratively) killing him. Finally he finds another survivor and it's well timed - Ezekiel has a hell of a leg injury and there's zero chance he can outrun the herd. 

Just when Ezekiel and the last man standing in his army think they are out of danger, another mass of Walkers is coming their way. And then there's the Savior who sneaks up from behind and kills the last man standing. So much for that. Why this Savior resembles a 1990s pedophile/serial killer is beyond me, but this asshole says he is supposed to bring "the king" to The Sanctuary alive. See, Negan wants to kill Ezekiel, Maggie, and Rick and have them join the Walker army that is chained to his front fence, to serve as an example of what happens when people betray him. I guess he isn't aware of Michonne's leash method of transporting people.  

As Ezekiel hobbles along as best he can, the Savior gives him a bunch of shit, saying he knows Ezekiel's background and how Ezekiel "played" the people in The Kingdom. He jokes that even in death they are still following his bullshit. Ezekiel is able to cut this asshole, but he throws the king to the ground and stands on his hurt leg. He starts talking about bringing Ezekiel's head back on a pike and leaving the rest of him for the Walkers, but much like Morales last week, he's also a dumbass and talks way too long...long enough for Jerry (yay! he's alive!), King Ezekiel's loyal teddy bear Samurai, to spring in and literally cut the guy in half. Bye 1990s pedophile/serial killer Savior. The reunion between king and subject is only momentarily a happy one as the herd of Walkers is still upon them. They are at a dead end and Jerry isn't able to break through the fence with his ax. Shit. 

In Disguises No One Knows

Carol has made it inside the building at this point and avoided the massacre. She takes out some of the Saviors inside but others escape to the parking lot with artillery. Carol tries her hand at taking them out as well, fakes a surrender and then takes one of them at knife point. The rest of the Saviors don't give a shit and start shooting through the guy to get to Carol. She is able to hit the button to open the parking lot gate and ducks as a bunch of Walkers step inside to attack the remaining Saviors. Carol yells that they need to stop fighting each other because the Walker problem is getting worse and one of the remaining dudes tells her she can simply walk away. Carol doesn't want to leave without all of the guns and ammo the Saviors were loading into a truck...but then she sees Ezekiel and Jerry fighting for their lives on the other side of the fence. What to do... save your comrades and give up on weapons you know are dangerous in the hands of your enemies? Or pursue the weapons knowing that this war will have causalities anyway? Carol goes with the former and the artillery truck gets away. Well, momentarily gets away. Daryl and Rick make a cameo in this hour and intercept the truck. All's well that ends well? 

I wish I could say the episode ends there. I do. But Carol, Ezekiel and Jerry are still trying to make their way to safety and the Walkers are coming at them from all sides. Ezekiel tells Carol and Jerry to leave him and he sets off to fight the herd on his own. Jerry says he will not leave his king and Ezekiel turns and screams "I am NOT your king! I'm just some guy." Just then Shiva springs in and starts slaughtering the Walkers. She fights them off bravely but is ultimately Walker food...the poor tiger that Ezekiel once saved and saved proudly, dies a horrible death paying back the favor. I can say with all honesty that I almost threw up as this was happening. 

The episode actually ends with King Ezekiel hobbling back into The Kingdom and making his way past his subjects without saying a word. No rousing speech. No words about losing a battle but winning the war. No requiem for the fallen. Just...nothing. 

This hour just about did me in. I'm going to mourn the loss of a CGI tiger more than several of the main characters we've lost on this show. And damn it, The Kingdom warriors were so close to victory and Carol was so close to looking happy again. The massacre alone was enough to send Ezekiel into a downward spiral, but I can't imagine his devastation with Shiva. He has said himself the tiger made him who he is. With no army...and no tiger...what kind of a leader will he be now? Will Carol have to step in? Can Alexandria and Hilltop pick up the slack now that The Kingdom army has pretty much been wiped out? Will we see the return of Oceanside? The garbage people? I at least hope that when they made their alliance with the Saviors...the deal included showers for all. 

TWD Season 8 Episode 3: Monsters

Tonight on The Walking Dead our heroes are faced with more "savagery vs mercy" decisions as the groups are finishing up their side missions and reconnecting with each other. There are moments in this hour to celebrate, moments of sadness, and definitely moments of frustration as the action of Season 8 continues. Who are the casualties of the All Out War in this third installment? Here's what went down in "Monsters."

You Sold Us Down The River

Catching up with Jesus and very pissed off versions of Tara and Morgan, the group is doing a slow march on foot back to Hilltop. The prisoners are tied together in a chain gang (but with rope) and the douchebag that killed young Benjamin is there. He taunts Morgan and Morgan eventually aims his gun to shoot him. A very large group of Walkers attacks just then and a number of prisoners are eaten, while many of them make a run for it. Morgan takes off after them and starts shooting. Jesus knocks the gun out of his hands and I'm about done with him. Morgan says they will continue to try to escape and Jesus says they will continue to stop them...but they are not going to kill them. The two men then get into a fight, with each one landing some decent punches and kicks on the other, and I will say that Jesus' hair looks amazing through the entire confrontation. Morgan finally tells Jesus and company that he's leaving because he can't be a part of this plan that will backfire at some point. Tara tells him he's right as he walks away, but she does not follow him. Jesus, Tara and Diane continue on to Hilltop with the prisoners.

All is quiet at Hilltop until a car pulls up to the gate. Dumbass Gregory thinks his people should let him back in to the community and Maggie is super pissed at him. She asks how he got Gabriel's car and he pretends not to know what happened to the priest. He starts talking about how he built Hilltop and all Maggie did was show up...and those pregnancy hormones are turned on their head and she starts yelling. "Shut your damn mouth! You're really gonna stand there and pretend you didn't try to sell us out, sell this place out to the Saviors?!?" Dumbass Gregory says that he was working toward peace and thought he could save lives by going to The Sanctuary. Maggie tells him goodbye and he pleads with her. He says he went to Negan because he was scared Maggie would lead Hilltop into a losing battle. He tells her he sees now that fighting the Saviors is the only way. "I was wrong. I made a mistake. And I'm sorry." Ultimately Maggie lets Dumbass Gregory in, probably not realizing this is not the only "do I or don't I" decision she'll need to make today. 

Jesus, Tara, and Diane roll up soon thereafter with a whole bunch of Saviors, and Dumbass Gregory flips out. He says those "monsters" are not coming in and tells Maggie she would be risking everyone's safety. Tara agrees. Jesus suggests locking them all up in empty trailers out back with 24 hour guards. He says they can't kill them because they surrendered. The way Maggie says "Jesus" after that makes me wonder if she's talking to him or letting out an exasperated "Jesus" the way the rest of us would. We don't see the final decision on the matter in this episode. 

Enough Is Enough

We resume the Rick and Morales face-off, and Morales explains he's not shooting Rick is because the Saviors were told not to kill him, the widow, or the king unless they absolutely have to. "Why are you here, Rick? I know you. Just like before, you're always the guy willing to rush in...but why?" Uh, bro, I don't think you can really say "I know you" to Rick. You guys hung out for what, a week maybe before the Walkers destroyed your camp and half of its inhabitants? Rick responds with an inquiry about Morales' family and Morales says they never made it to Birmingham, which was their destination when they left the camp. He scoffs when Rick tries to offer his sympathies and Rick mentions he lost his wife too. He then rattles off the rest of the list that Morales would know: Shane, Andrea, Glenn...and then he tells Morales that Negan killed Glenn and Glenn's pregnant wife is "the widow" Negan referred to in his instructions. Rick doesn't understand how Morales could be part of Negan's gang. 

Morales gets increasingly more tense as the conversation continues, with his nose wrinkling and his head tilting back and forth. He's starting to annoy the shit out of me. He tells Rick that when he lost his family, he lost his mind. The Saviors found him and it gave him a sense of worth again. "So yeah, I'm Negan. To make it this long and this far, I had to be. I had to be something. Just like you."  Rick tries to reason with him some more but Daryl ends the conversation for them (thank you - I feel like this has gone on forever). He sneaks up from behind and shoots Morales in the head as Rick starts to yell not to. When Rick tries to tell Daryl who he just killed, Daryl says he knew already and shows no remorse. 

The Saviors arrive and Daryl and Rick have to essentially dance and shoot their way through the hallways to secure their safety. They don't leave the building with heavy artillery, but hey, they found a baby. Rick takes some Polaroids of the bloody victory scene and I'm not entirely sure why. Documenting his kills for Negan? 

What About Us?

Back in Aaron's sorely understaffed group, the shooting continues as the zombie Saviors are devouring their own. Aaron has helped his wounded boyfriend away from the fighting and they sit near a tree to assess his wounds (any time a gunshot victim is sitting against a tree on these shows, it never ends well), and Aaron starts to cry. He apologizes to Eric for convincing him to fight. Eric is starting to cry as well and tells Aaron he needs to get back to the very not stacked group of fighters because they need him. Aaron doesn't want to leave Eric by himself, but Eric puts a hand on Aaron's face and says, "You know I love you. You know I'm right." They share what I assume will be their last kiss and Aaron runs back to the action. 

When all is said and done, Aaron's group is victorious and he rushes back to the tree. Eric's gun is there but he is not. Aaron cries and follows the blood trail...and he sees Walker Eric leaving the area. Poor guy. Aaron breaks down and is ushered away by a comrade and doesn't follow Eric and put him down. Kind of surprising, but there are more Walkers in view so maybe best not to cause a snot-crying commotion in their area. 

The show, er, war must go on though and Aaron meets up with Rick and Daryl. Rick introduces him to Gracie and Aaron offers to take her back to Hilltop. He says he and Eric had planned to go there anyway to update Maggie and he thinks Gracie will be safe there. Well yeah, no one pays much attention to Judith in Alexandria. God knows what would happen if another baby showed up. Aaron chokes out, "Please? I have to." He's breaking my heart. Rick hands him the baby and Aaron heads out. Daryl and Rick start to head out too when they are faced with more gunshots. Rick calls out to the lone shooter behind the tree and promises the guy he can leave unharmed if he gives up the location of the guns. Rick says, "I'm giving you my word. There's not a lot that's worth much these days, but a man's word has got to mean something, right?" The Savior steps out into the open and says the guns were sent to Gavin's outpost the day before. Then Daryl shoots him. So much for Rick's word. 

We Can See In The Dark

The episode opens and closes with the fighters from The Kingdom on their path "to certain victory." King Ezekiel addresses his people after they realize the Saviors know their location. Their surprise attack at a satellite sight was ruined by a scout but Ezekiel isn't worried. They continue on through the woods with a surrender strategy. Some of The Kingdom warriors allow themselves to get caught while the others flank the Saviors and shoot them from the sides. At the end of this battle all of Ezekiel's folks are still standing and he is still smiling. Hell, he even has Carol smiling! 

Ezekiel and company make it to the satellite location after another round of sneaking up and taking out Saviors, and and they dispose of the enemies outside the building pretty easily. Almost too easily. They realize once again that everyone in their army is alive and accounted for, and Ezekiel is starting to make a believer out of Carol. She smiles and says she's going to sweep the compound, and when she leaves...the Saviors open fire from the top windows of the facility. Ezekiel and his group are sitting ducks. 

The episode ends there and we're starting to get somewhere...I think. Eric honestly lasted longer on this show than I thought he would, and Morales annoyed me so quickly that I'm really glad Daryl took him out as soon as he did. While the followers in The Kingdom may have thought their "we will lose not one of our ranks" mantra would get them continuous victories, the rest of us know that in TWD world the ranks would suffer greatly. How many armored soldiers will survive? Will badass Carol save the day (I love it when she does that)? Will Jesus' plan of keeping the surrendered Saviors alive literally come back to bite him? AND are we going to find out what the hell happened to Gabriel? I never thought I would care so much about his whereabouts, but I loathe Dumbass Gregory and would actually like Gabriel to come out of this one unscathed. I've come a long way from agreeing with Carol's "leave him!" cry when the Wolves attacked Alexandria.

AHS Cult Episode 11: Great Again

Well kids, we have reached the final episode of American Horror Story: Cult.  When we last left our cast of questionable characters, Kai's cult was full steam ahead and one way or another there was going to be some sort of showdown. Kai vs Beverly? Kai vs Ally? Ally vs Beverly? I'll say that some of the events in this hour surprised me, some made me roll my eyes, and a few even caused me to cheer from my couch. Who emerged victorious when it was all said and done? Here's what went down in "Great Again."

Was It Something You Said?

The episode opens in 2018, where Kai is at a maximum security prison playing pinky power with a female guard and convincing her to show him her titties. Classy. Gloria and her titties have bought into the "divine ruler" bullshit, as have a ton of the inmates in this prison. Kai has built a new army of different ages and races, many of whom don't seem to realize exactly how expendable they are. More on that later, but how the hell did Kai get here?

We flash back now to 11 months earlier with Ally confronting the mole from the man army. He explains that he wears a recorder and is working with the police...but only because the police had been investigating Detective Jack. There were rumors that he was a crooked cop. How bout that? This guy was only supposed to expose that Jack was on the take, but low and behold he ended up as a mole in a cult! When Ally realizes the mole wears a recorder only and not a live wire, she kills him. She then breaks the news to Kai and he realizes Winter was innocent after all. No shit, Kai. You strangled her for absolutely no reason. He has an emotional breakdown (better him than Ally) and Ally comforts him, saying Winter's death doesn't have to be in vain. She tells Kai he can honor her by becoming the man she always believed he could be and I gag. 

Kai goes into the living room of his house/headquarters where the man army is ready for their next round of instructions. The group has gathered to execute the "bigger and better than Manson" plan and each dude has a pre-made backpack of items to send them on a killing spree. The victims? One hundred pregnant women. See, the Manson Family killing one pregnant woman wasn't big enough. Kai wants his cult to slay 100 and explains exactly how the women should be stabbed in order to impale both mother and child. Really? Beverly stands in the kitchen shaking from head to toe. When Ally approaches, Beverly begs Ally to kill her. She tells Ally, "If Kai had told me to, I would have killed you...and gotten a cheeseburger right after." Ha! Please Ally, don't kill Beverly. She's too priceless and most of the comic relief disappeared with Meadow and Harrison. Ally asks her to just hold on for a little while longer, and I'm hoping this means Ally is about to do something useful. 

Don't Leave Me Hanging

The "night of 100 Tates" arrives and Kai and the man army are ready to roll out. Ally starts to leave the house and tells an inquisitive member of the man army she's just going to get some snacks, which is the worst excuse ever. I'm surprised she isn't seized right then and there, but she walks out to a truck full of FBI agents and a raid begins. This had been building for a while - the FBI had their suspicions after Meadow's assassination attempt and they approached Ally to become their inside informant while she was in the psych ward. Neat. Through the haze of a smoke bomb we see some of the man army members killed by the FBI. Some kill themselves. Others are taken out by a now stoic Beverly and I cheer her on. Kai looks to be the last man alive and when he is ushered to the truck, he realizes Ally betrayed him and goes apeshit as he is driven away. Beverly is handcuffed as well and appears relieved as she makes her way out of the house. 

Several months later we see Ally running a very thriving restaurant, as her popularity has rejuvenated interest in The Butchery. Ever the humble hostess, Ally declines taking photos with patrons who refer to her as "one of the most inspiring women of our time" because she's just trying to put everything behind her. Oh for god's sake. Haven't we heard this shit before? Why don't we just have her on the Lana Winters Show at this point like Lee Miller in Roanoke? Suddenly Beverly is there (how on earth is Beverly there?) and she tells Ally that Kai pled guilty to everything and isn't going to trial. Like the rest of us, Beverly doesn't understand how she wasn't arrested, and Ally says she told the FBI Beverly was a victim and did not have a direct role in any of the murders. And plus, as a black woman she didn't fit the profile. Beverly still looks confused and I don't blame her. She casually says the only murder Kai didn't claim was Ivy's. Ally maintains that Kai killed her wife in front of her and her last words were "I love you, I'm sorry." You've got to be fucking kidding me. Beverly maintains her "you're full of shit" look, but really Ivy is a passing thought at this point anyway since Ally has been banging the new chef, Erica, for 8 weeks now. The lovebirds invite Beverly to Oz's upcoming birthday party and she accepts. 

Oz seems to have taken to Erika and she seems to be right at home with Oz and Ally. The birthday party is successful and it's nice to see that Oz still has friends after the crazy shit he and his moms went through. The phone is ringing off the hook these days and Erika screens the calls. At one point she mentions that Rachel Maddow's people called again, but Ally doesn't want to give any interviews about what happened. Too worried people will figure out you're a murdering liar, Ally? Erika encourages her to do the show since Maddow is "a legit feminist icon" and looks to Beverly to back her up. Beverly's response is, "If she turned down Lana Winters, why would she talk to Rachel fucking Maddow?" AMAZING! I was only (half) kidding earlier when I mentioned Stupid Lana. I get a really good laugh out of this. Ally says all she wants to do is be a soccer mom and a small business owner, and the conversation is interrupted by another phone call. Ally answers this one and it's a collect call from Kai. She accepts the charges and... wait. She accepts the charges?!? I'm at a loss. Ally wants to put it all behind her but sent him Oz's real paternity results. Why? Kai tells Ally that her status as the mother of his child was the only thing keeping her alive, but all bets are off now. She gloats that she's doing great and he'll spend the rest of his life in prison, and Kai threatens her some more and just about breaks the phone before he hangs up. 

All This Time You Were Pretending

The next time we see Ally, she's announcing her candidacy to unseat Senator Jackson...exactly what Kai wanted to do in 2018. Oh. My. God. Kai is banging Gloria when he sees this on TV and he notices Beverly is right by Ally's side. I hope Gloria likes it rough, because that's totally what she's getting tonight. 

Ally runs her campaign using her cult experience and trauma to gain support. One of her videos shows her kneeling at Ivy's grave. Anyone else notice the dates on the headstone say April 14th, 1984-2017? Was that special dinner also a birthday dinner or does Ally "just not recall" what day Ivy died? Anyway, Ally is trailing in the polls due to her lack of political experience, though she tries hard to spin that by saying she's a woman who will go to Capitol Hill and "take a sledgehammer to their antiquated system of oppression." She still goes into the debate against Senator Jackson with the odds against her. But wait... Beverly has news for Ally just before the debate starts. She says Kai was found dead in prison, his face mutilated beyond recognition. Riiiiiight. What Kai actually did was convince one of the inmates that kinda, sorta resembles him to get matching tattoos and pretend to be Kai while Kai makes his escape with Gloria's help. What dude doesn't know is Kai's plan was actually to stab him to death and make his face unrecognizable. He's coming for you, Ally. 

I mean, really?

Ally and Senator Jackson are trading insults on stage in front of a packed audience when Ally thinks she spots a familiar face in the audience. He approaches the mic in the aisle to ask a question and he introduces himself as Councilman Kai Anderson. Wowwww. The audience panics and Kai grabs a gun from Glora and climbs the stage. Senator Jackson steps in front of Ally and Kai hits him with the gun and knocks him to the ground. He tells Ally she's not a hero - she's a symbol he created. "You symbolize the hope that women will one day win an argument with their husbands...that they won't be cat called when they walk down the street...that their bosses won't talk about their tits anymore...that they'll make just as much money as the men make...that the fight is win-able! When I kill you, they'll see that there is no hope." Speaking of hope, where the hell is Beverly in all of this? Security guards? Anyone? Kai raises his gun to Ally's head and says women can't lead and women can't win. He pulls the trigger but the gun is not loaded. Kai turns to Gloria, who is now standing and smiling. She had been in cahoots with Ally for quite some time and the whole thing was strategically staged.  Just as he and the rest of us realize he's been had, Ally addresses him. "There is something more dangerous in this world than a humiliated man - a nasty woman." Beverly steps up from behind then and blows Kai's brains out. 

So Much For My Happy Ending

There's no big surprise when Ally wins the election and she puts Oz to bed that night with a huge smile on her face, telling him she is going to try to make the world better for him. He cuddles an elephant stuffed animal (reminiscent of Ivy's clown costume) and Ally hands him a Twisty toy to snuggle with and says she has to go to a meeting. When her son asks why she would need to go to a meeting at night she says she is meeting "some very special, very powerful friends who are going to help bring about that better world we were talking about...Women. A group of powerful, empowered women who want to change the system." Before Ally heads off to this meeting, we see her put on a black cloak. My first thought is: "Holy shit! Am I going to get Fiona Goode and Madam LaLaurie after all? Is this a Coven crossover?!?" But then I watch the scene again and realize this is a SCUM cloak and Ally is resuming the work of Valerie Solanas. 

And with that, Season 7 of American Horror Story is over. I'll say that when Cult started I was very much into the killer clown posse, the weekly reveal of who the members where, how the members became Kai followers (that Emma Roberts pet adoption event scene is one of my absolute favorites), and why those members began to turn on one another. With a theme centered around cults, the man army made sense, as did the bedtime stories and test of true loyalty in the kool-aid episode. But Cult took a turn around the time of the "Valerie Solanas invented The Zodiac Killer" hour and the season struggled for me a little after that. The most loyal allies became dispensable, Ally went from basket case to wife-murderer in a snap, Kai killed his two siblings when his bond with them seemed unbreakable, and instead of mystery and suspense, we mostly got repetitive rhetoric and gore during the second half of the season. Don't get me wrong - I like a gruesome death as much as the next viewer (is it even okay to say that?) but how Kai went from saving the innocent captives in the Judgement House to unleashing a slaughter on so many innocent people is still a gray area for me. His motivation was...Trump? Babbitt? Manson? The captivating power of manwiches? An All-4-One messiah baby? I'm still not entirely clear on the point of it all...other than allowing Sarah Paulson to get the best of a serial killer once again. Maybe I just need to think on it more. 

I will say though that the majority of the performances were fantastic. I feel like Evan Peters often takes a back seat to the women of AHS each season, but this was his year to shine, hands down. He was amazing. Billie Lourd, Alison Pill, Billy Eichner and Leslie Grossman were all great additions and I hope they return, especially if we are going to continue on without heavy hitters like Jessica Lange, Kathy Bates, Lily Rabe, Denis O'Hare, and Angela Bassett (though she did some directing this season). Not sure what American Horror Story holds in 2018, but here's hoping we get back to the supernatural or even extraterrestrial next year. Until then I will probably go back and watch Roanoke, Hotel, and Coven to remember the good ol' days. 

AHS Cult Episode 10: Charles (Manson) In Charge

Well kids, the season finale of American Horror Story: Cult is next week and the characters are not just dispensable at this point - their exits are reckless. Episode 10 continues the bloodbath and takes us one step closer to...I'm not sure. I guess we are prepping for some kind of showdown and based on tonight's events, we deserve a payoff. Who didn't make it out alive this evening? Here's what went down in "Charles (Manson) In Charge."

Neurotic To The Bone

The episode opens on October 19th, 2016 during the final presidential debate. Winter and two of her friends are sitting on the couch in the Anderson living room talking about how no one is buying the shit Trump is selling. Kai sits at the kitchen table on his laptop, posting comments on websites like "I want him to win just to shut these dumb bitches up!" Kai tells the ladies that people hate Hillary and she'll never win because people won't turn out to vote for her, but Trump supporters would stand out bleeding in the rain or snow to vote for him. One of Winter's friends baits him and he slaps her in the face. He looks genuinely startled and apologizes quickly, but the girl says she is going to press charges and runs out of the house. Winter tells her brother he has crossed the line and then we fast forward...

Two weeks later Kai is sitting in anger management therapy as part of his probation and Bebe Babbitt is his therapist. She immediately asks him if he is familiar with the work of Valerie Solanas and he makes a joke. Instead of being frustrated with her new patient, Bebe encourages Kai to get into politics because of his charisma. "I think if you had a purpose, you would change the world." What?!? How did we get there already? Bebe explains that she is an old school feminist and her favorite politician of all time is Donald Trump because he is the first world leader to start hammering away at the dam of female rage. "With every Tweet, every eye roll, every pussy grab, he is slowly releasing the fury." Bebe calls Kai special and tells him he can be a spear in this movement. She believes he will drown in all that rage but "you will die knowing you saved us all and you'll be famous for it." Yikes. Isn't it wonderful that there are women like Bebe to help the mentally unstable? 

Do You Have The Time To Listen To Me Whine

We go now to the present day where Councilman Kai is holding a rally to talk shit about Senator Herbert Jackson, the dude he is hoping to unseat (with no clowns?) in the 2018 election. There are an array of protesters shouting behind the crowd of supporters and they start moving toward Kai and his crew. Both sides are screaming at one another and one protester throws a container of piss at Kai while another one blasts him with pepper spray. What a mess. Senator Jackson even gives a news interview saying if anyone should be taking Kai seriously, it should be the Department of Justice, and this does not go over well with Kai and the man army. 

Kai now believes the feds are out to get him and he's eager to start getting rid of clown posse evidence. He tasks Winter and Ally with revamping the ice cream truck to look more like an ice cream truck than a pedophilemobile. Winter asks Ally about Ivy because she doesn't believe Kai's story about Ivy taking off and going to cooking school in Paris (check your parents' room, kid). Winter says what she had with Ivy was real and she thinks Kai killed her. Ally's response? "If something did happen to Ivy...what makes you think it was Kai?" She smirks then walks away. Winter. Please. Slap this bitch. 

It's now story time at the Anderson house and the man army gathers their sleeping bags as Kai tells them about Charles Manson. We get a very, very graphic re-enactment of August 8th and 9th, 1969 when actress Sharon Tate, Roman Polanski's pregnant wife, and four others were murdered by "Manson Family" members Tex Watson, Susan Atkins, Patricia Krenwinkel, and Linda Kasabian. Manson's followers left the word "Pig" in blood on one of the doors and Manson himself had hoped this night would kick off some sort of apocalyptic race war...though that was definitely not the case. Kai tells the man army they need to follow Manson's lead but go bigger this time. 

About Nothing And Everything All At Once

Kai's bigger and better plan involves poor handless Gary, a Kai loyalist to his very last breath. Gary is lured to a Planned Parenthood location under the impression he and the man army are stealing a list of women scheduled for late term abortions. Once inside the building, Kai and the clown posse (with unknowns in Ivy's and Gary's costumes) let Gary know that he is going to make a great contribution to the cause before stabbing him repeatedly. When a Planned Parenthood employee shows up for work in the morning, Gary's dead bloody body is leaning against the door with a sign that says "Stop The Slaughter." Some of his guts are hanging out too. Gross. 

A visibly shaken Beverly Hope is live on the scene and she interviews Kai in front of the Planned Parenthood building. Kai tells the camera that Gary was his supporter and a dear friend - a kind, gentle man. He then blames this crime on "the leftist terrorists and Senator Jackson, who supports them." Kai says an anti-life group killed Gary for being pro-life and my palm smashes against my forehead. When the interview finally ends, Kai gives Beverly a bunch of shit for not selling the story and Beverly looks scared and defeated.

Beverly has tea with Winter at The Butchery (how are they even paying the water and electric bills there to make tea?) and Winter apologies for trying to frame Beverly for Detective Jack's murder. Winter notes that the Beverly in front of her is broken and needs to escape. She even gives Beverly a train ticket to Montana to try to atone for the hell Beverly went through in the Anderson house version of solitary confinement. Thinking this is a test, Beverly pledges her support to Kai and says she will be his loyal follower to the end.  

Grasping To Control

Kai is unhinged at this point, checking the light fixtures and other areas of the house for bugs and wires. He tells Ally that he knows there is a mole in their group who is talking to the feds and he runs into the master bedroom mausoleum to get away from the buzzing sound he swears he hears. He sees Vincent sit up and the dead doctor asks Kai how he can turn that frown upside down. Ha! Kai admits he probably shouldn't have killed his brother and with that, Charles Manson appears because what not at this point? Manson is also played by Evan Peters and he tells Kai to identify the Judas...Manson says he trusted too much and that was his mistake. "It's always the bitches, man. Can't trust the bitches."

This conversation, if we can call it that, is interrupted when Ally bangs on the door. She's found a bug (I think?) and Kai flips out. Another interruption - Bebe is at the front door now and she needs Kai's attention. Down to the basement they go and she's super pissed. Kai was supposed to incite women's rage so they would go on the same kind of rampage as Coach Beiste's Valerie's far fetched Zodiac Killer group of women, but instead Kai has enraged everyone and created chaos everywhere. Bebe scolds him for allowing his sister to be defeated, for allowing Ivy to be killed, and for "breaking" Beverly. She even goes so far as to say "If only your mother had aborted you." Kai claims none of this is his fault because those people are/were weak. He says he had no intention of becoming a martyr to some dead bitch's cause...that he wants women enraged so he can break them down and lead them because they are too emotional to run things. "Women need to be grabbed by their pussies and lead, preferably to the kitchen to make me a sandwich." Oh shit! Bebe knocks Kai to the ground and aims her gun at him. Instead of pulling the trigger, she first wants to quote Valerie Solanas, allowing time for Ally to but a bullet through Bebe's head. No more crazy Frances Conroy...

When we next see Kai, Winter is giving him a buzz cut and blue locks of hair fall to the floor. She's very gentle with him and he hands her a razor to shave his face. Winter has an opportunity here but she just begins shaving. She tells her brother that when everyone gets what they need from Kai and leave him, she will still be there. Winter also says the only way for her to be with him in the end is to get away from him now. "I love you, but when I look at you now, all I feel is terror." He suggests that leaving would be a sign of betrayal, and when she starts to respond, Kai shifts in anger and she (barely) cuts him on the throat. Again, she has an opportunity but doesn't take it. Kai tells her she is the only person who really talks to him and really knows him and says he doesn't want to lose her, but he would be willing to let her go. He wants her by his side later when he's President and giving speeches to Congress and stuff. The exchange is sweet...until Kai pulls out that train ticket to Montana and beckons to his man army to take her away. I'm thinking Winter will end up in whatever solitary confinement area that once housed Beverly, but no. Ally has framed Winter and convinced Kai that Winter planted the bug in the house. He now believes Winter is the mole and she has betrayed him. Despite her best efforts to try to bring Kai back to reality, he chokes Winter to death with his bare hands and I'm done. Come to find out, there actually is a mole and it's someone in the man army. He runs and jumps in a car after he sees what happened to Winter and Ally follows him. She hops in the passenger seat of the car and he knows he is caught. 

The episode ends there and I feel like I am in a perpetual state of "what the fuck?" Really? Really with killing Winter? I was a little confused about sacrificing Gary, and Bebe kinda came out of nowhere tonight, but Winter? Are manwiches that potent that Kai would do anything for the bitch who makes them? He had JUST apologized to his dead brother for killing him and here we are? Sigh. The next episode is the final American Horror Story: Cult episode and I'm keeping my fingers crossed that Beverly regains her balls of steel and takes care of Kai and Ally. I'm over Kai's delusions and Ally's smirk. I think I actually prefer her in annoying emotional breakdown mode, which I never thought I would say about any character played by Sarah Paulson. We'll see what happens to these fools next week, but in the meantime, they better start spreading lye in one of the guest rooms. We're nearing overflow status. 

TWD Season 8 Episode 2: The Damned

When we last left our heroes on The Walking Dead, they were scattering after an action-packed hour of wasting bullets and spending way too much time talking to the enemy. A Walker herd had descended upon The Sanctuary and Gabriel made a rookie move of trying to save a jackass while leaving the keys in the car. Tonight's episode is centered around the side missions needed to take out the non-Sanctuary Saviors, and the hour is even more battle heavy than last week's. With some surprises in store, we also revisit the moral conflicts that come when you declare war on humans instead of zombies. Here's what went down in "The Damned."

Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'

Aaron and Eric invade one of Negan's satellite locations in their armored vehicles with a gang of folks I don't really recognize, and Eric sure gets an "A" for effort in the way he tries to manage his machine gun. He is super brave in this attack, but Eric is shot in the gut and we don't find out in this episode whether he lives or dies. I assume he's toast and this opens up a Jesus/Aaron romance. I would be on board with that. 

Though they are using a lot of gun power, Aaron's group doesn't actually move in on the Saviors and they begin to push back. For a second it looks as if Aaron and the rest of his company might be screwed, but turns out there was actually never a plan to full on invade the location. The idea was to let all of the dead Saviors turn into Walkers and attack their own. Nice! I'm so glad this worked. Aaron totally got the shaft with his army though...the other groups are way more stacked. 

Love To Pretend That You're Good

Morgan, Jesus, Tara and Dianne (The Kingdom's resident badass bitch...at least before Carol arrived) are leading an assault on another one of Negan's satellite locations. Morgan is all too casual as he makes his kills and we've realllllly moved beyond "all life is precious" at this point. Well, he's moved on. Tara and Jesus encounter an unarmed Savior who cries and begs for his life. Tara wants to put a bullet in his brain immediately but Jesus is having moral difficulties (wouldn't have it any other way). He engages Tara in a "this can't be about revenge" discussion and they let their guard down for a moment. The Savior grabs Jesus and his gun and turns out he is a total douchebag. Jesus elbows the guy and gets his gun back but still hesitates to shoot him. Tara is losing her mind, but in the end, Jesus pistol whips the dude and ties him up. Sigh. How long is this going to take to come back to bite him? Jesus also orders his group to stand down when a group of Saviors surrenders their weapons outside. Morgan and Tara both say their mission was to come and kill and they are pretty pissed that Jesus is allowing these assholes to live. I imagine Rick would be just as angry. 

Meanwhile, Carol and Ezekiel are having their own problems with a shit ton of Walkers near their assigned assault area. A Savior spy has seen the group and run off to alert a satellite site that the Kingdom folks are coming their way. Carol is anxious to find him and fortunately the blood trail suggests the Savior was hit by a bullet and he's moving slowly. As the group tries to locate him on their way to the compound, Ezekiel is being Ezekiel with his big talk and positive attitude. The faces Carol makes each time he speaks are priceless and she finally pulls him aside to give him a dose of reality. She reminds him they might not win the battle and not all of them may make it out alive. His response? "And yet I smile." Love. Him. They walk through the woods a bit more and we see Shiva slaughter a man who I assume is the Savior spy on the run. The Savior had a walkie talkie though and alerted his community that Ezekiel and his crew were coming. Not to ever be underestimated, King Ezekiel says they will press forward anyway to certain victory.  

Got My Baby Cryin'

Rick and Daryl have their own group of men in another building as they look for guns and enemies. Well hell yeah they need guns...and ammo given the bullets wasted to shatter all the top story windows at The Sanctuary last week. Dwight had drawn a map of this building to indicate where the weapons are stored and Rick and Daryl decide to split up to cover the area quicker. Rick encounters a bedroom (people live here comfortably?) and when he gets ready to enter the next room, a man tackles him. They fight and the guy tells Rick there are no guns. Rick ultimately impales him on a pipe popping out from the wall and heads back toward the room he had previously been trying to get into. He walks into...a baby's room...with zoo animals and "Gracie" painted on the wall...and baby Gracie is alive and asleep in the crib. Rick, realizing he probably just killed her dad, begins to cry. I'm sure he's thinking about what would happen to Judith if he dies as well. 

Rick collects himself and heads to another room (I assume he is going to go back for Gracie once the rest of the place is cleared) and he runs into Morales, who immediately aims a gun at him. Do you remember Morales from Atlanta? No? I barely do. He and his family were part of that initial camp back in the days where Carl wasn't annoying, Shane wasn't crazy (or dead), and Carol didn't have hair wasn't a badass. When shit hit the fan Morales took his wife and kids and parted ways with the group. Wonder where his family is now. Anyway, Morales looks super sinister and waves a walkie talkie around. He says, "It's over, Rick. I've called the Saviors back and they're coming."

The episode ends there and my first thought is - what really happened in this hour? Ezekiel's group did a lot of walking, Aaron's group did a lot of shooting, and Rick and Daryl took quite a bit of screen time exploring whatever building they are in. My only big takeaway tonight was Gracie. There is a fan theory (I wish I had come up with it) that Gracie is actually the little girl in Rip Van Rick's flash forward sequence last week...and that Judith will be among the dead after the All Out War is over. The stuffed animal in Gracie's crib looks a hell of a lot like the stuffed animal future Judith carries around in that scene. So does Gracie make it back to Alexandria? Will Daryl or Rick kill Morales or will Morales align himself with the Grimes gang once again? Why even bring Morales back now? Thank you for the Shiva sighting and the Carol/Ezekiel banter, but can we get to them actually doing something? And finally, what's going on with Gabriel and Negan in that trailer? For their sake I hope Gabriel did not, in fact, soil himself. That trailer is tiny and probably hot. The Walkers outside would probably smell better. 

AHS Cult Episode 9: Drink The Kool-Aid

I know I have quite a bit of catching up to do. I've been traveling a lot over the past few weeks and am several episodes behind in my AHS and TWD posts. I will hopefully have everything updated in the next few days, especially now that we are approaching the Cult finale. Episode 9 takes us to WTF Land, as this season has already passed Crazy Town. Insert "wrong turn at Albuquerque" jokes here. Kai and his man army have made the full jump from political movement to cult and Ally...well, Ally is just friggin' killing me. Here's what went down in "Drink the Kool-Aid."

I'm Gonna Be Like Him

The episode opens with Kai having a slumber party with his man army and telling them various cult history bedtime stories. He begins with Heaven's Gate in 1997 where 39 cult members had committed mass suicide via a pudding/poison/apple sauce combination. They had hoped to leave their earthly bodies and ascend to the great unknown in a spaceship. Kai then moves on to David Koresh and his Branch Davidians cult in Waco, Texas in 1993. Koresh's followers bought into the idea that he was the only man who should, uh, continue the group's population. The rest of the men stood by (celibate) while Koresh impregnated the often very young women in the compound. When the group was on the verge of being arrested for illegal possession of firearms, many fled, but those 79 who stayed behind were either shot by their leader or burned alive in the buildings that were intentionally set on fire. And finally, Kai tells the story of Jim Jones and The People's Temple. This guy coined the phrase "drink the kool-aid," which is news to me, and his group started in California and relocated to its final destination in Guyana. After some of his followers invited Congressman Leo Ryan to investigate human rights violations in 1978, Jones' utopia became a nightmare. Leo Ryan as well as several NBC employees were shot and killed, and over 900(!) members of The People's Temple died the same day after drinking cyanide infused kool-aid. Kai refers to all of these dudes as "great men" and the man army buys into every word. 

At the next City Council meeting Kai suggests banning a number of websites that he considers "offensive" and I roll my eyes. Kai is looking to connect every computer in town to a private network, the cost of which is ridiculous, and Perry (the one Councilman who ever speaks up at these meetings but is always shut down) is not having it. He is the only one not to vote for this new Act, and the other members all seem to raise their hands in fear rather than support. I'm surprised Perry is still alive. Kai follows up this victory by announcing his plans to run for U.S. Senate in 2018 even though the incumbent is popular and has already served 3 terms. Something tells me whoever that guy is will probably get a visit from the dwindling clown posse. 

We'll Get Together Then

Ally and Ivy are at their house finally having the "fuck you" talk we've been waiting for, with each accusing the other of destroying their family. Ivy tells her wife she felt like she was spiraling out of control and needed someone to tell her what to do, where to go, and what to believe. "It felt so good to take my hands off the wheel." Ally gets on a high horse and reminds her that people died because of this cult and I'm sitting on my couch screaming "VINCENT DIED BECAUSE OF YOU!" Ivy says she was on her way out and wants to know why Ally would join with Kai. Ally does her crying thing and talks about their son, their family, blah, blah, blah. "I'm not saying that if we get out of this we're going to be together, but if we can escape I'm not leaving Oz's mother behind."

Almost on cue, Winter and Oz walk through the door and Ally gives him a Twisty book and sends him to his room so the adults can talk. Winter apologies to Ally for her involvement in everything and says they need to run away and they need to run away now. Ivy tearfully nods and Ally agrees. The only problem is, the man army is now at the front door and they escort the women and Oz to Kai's house for an emergency meeting. Ally doesn't like the idea of bringing her son with them (you don't have a choice honey) but the man army says Oz can watch cartoons while they meet. 

The ladies gather with the man army in Kai's basement and Beverly joins them. Bev immediately starts beating the shit out of Winter (she's earned it), and Kai enters the room wearing all white and breaks it up. He begins talking about "the power space" and grabs a tray with a very large container of kool-aid. "We need to do something radical." The ladies tell him he is making a mistake...that he needs them to get to the next level and not just the man army. Kai spews some shit about removing themselves from the shackles of their bodies and returning as superior beings. He then tells everyone in the room to take a cup. The first man Kai points to can't bring himself to drink so Gary shoots him. Beverly sees this, gets on her knees, and drinks quickly. Ally, Ivy and Winter follow, and then the man army yells and cheers while they drink. Kai is the last to taste the kool-aid. There was no poison. It was merely a test and everyone except for that one dude has proven their loyalty. Good grief.  

We're Gonna Have A Good Time Then

Ally and Ivy go back to their house and prepare for the escape. Ivy is hesitant to walk away from their life and she makes the mistake of asking, "what about Winter?" Ally's reaction is warranted and there's no more talk of Ivy's girlfriend. The women head to school to pick Oz up and get the hell out of there...but he's already been picked up by Winter and taken to Kai's house. She's seriously still the worst nanny ever. Kai is trying to do some male bonding and makes Oz believe that he needs a daddy in his life. He even goes as far as telling Oz that he is Oz's real father via the local sperm bank. He tells Ally and Ivy when they arrive, "I've kept close track of all of my children, but Oz is special." Seriously? I don't think that's a thing guys can do after their sperm donations. I need someone to call bullshit. Oz tells his moms he wants to stay with his daddy and Kai suggests the ladies go home and get reacquainted after their long separation. 

Ally and Ivy know that if Kai is pushed enough there's a chance he will kill all three of them so they let Oz stay the night at the Anderson house. They can't find anything in their sperm bank paperwork regarding the identity of Oz's biological father but Ivy is worried that Kai is telling the truth. Ally makes a nice dinner and tells Ivy she'll go to the clinic in the morning and find out for sure. Ivy doesn't understand how Ally can be so calm, but Ally believes Oz is safe for the night and she thinks she knows how to get him back. Ivy says the only way possible is murder. Ally agrees, saying she has a plan...but tonight she wants to sit down, eat some food, and drink some wine. So I assume that means no one is minding The Butchery this evening? That place has to have either been condemned or gone out of business at this point, right?

Ally opens a bottle of wine similar to the one they had on their honeymoon and this all seems a little strange. She tells Ivy, "Tonight we start over" but it's creepy. Ally just holds her glass and watches Ivy eat and drink for a bit, then she puts food on her own plate. She starts talking about her time in the psych ward and how much pain she was in and how she thought about killing herself. "And then I thought about you and how you left me alone in there without a word. No visits. Not even a glimpse of Oz in all that time." She goes on to tell Ivy that the only thing that got her through those weeks was the thought of revenge. This bitch. Ivy tries to defend herself and says she didn't think it was best for Oz to visit Ally while she was being evaluated and all I think is "Ivy, stop drinking the wine and eating the damn food!" Ally says she couldn't forgive Ivy for anything she's done and she was cured by the thought of revenge. Ivy tells her this assertive, strong woman thing is just a passing phase...and Ally will revert back to a coward in no time. "You can dream of revenge, but I'm not afraid of you." At that moment Ivy begins to cough up blood...she's been ingesting arsenic from the wine and food and she realizes she's a goner. Before she dies she tells Ally that Oz will never forgive her, you know, like Ally is going to tell Oz that she poisoned his other mother, but Ally already has a story thought up about Ivy leaving them both behind. So really, Oz will never forgive Ivy...who dies a slow gurgling death on the floor. 

Come On Let's Play

Ally does go to the sperm bank and has to bribe the woman who works there to see Oz's file. Turns out Kai is not the father (said in my best Maury Povich voice), but Ally changes the file so she can make Kai believe Oz is really his kid. She invites him over for dinner once again and casually tells him she killed Ivy and it felt "fucking fantastic." Kai has a look on his face like "is this manwich poisoned?" but Ally tells him she wouldn't poison him because a boy needs his father. She shows him the "proof" that he was the chosen sperm donor, and she says she chose him not even knowing his name because even then she knew he was extraordinary. I just threw up in my mouth a little. Kai thinks he now has his messiah baby who is destined for greatness and they can be a real family. He even treats Ivy like family - she now resides in the master bedroom mausoleum with the three dead Andersons. 

The episode ends there and damn it, I liked Ivy. There was this brief moment when Ally was trying to help Meadow that I was rooting for her, but that time has gone. I mean, WTF? She threw Vincent under the bus, murdered her wife, and she's completely aligned with Kai? Color me pissed. It's been a while since Sarah Paulson was the last man standing on AHS so I'm sure Ryan Murphy had to write that in this season. As we move into the final episodes and the characters are dwindling, I have to wonder where the hell this is going now. Beverly was first to drink the kool-aid tonight, Winter had no problem picking up Oz from school so he could be held at the Anderson house, and Ivy's freaking dead now. Is this cult just going to run a muck for two more episodes? Are we just going to spend two more hours listening to Kai say "fake news" over and over? Can Kathy Bates or Jessica Lange please come in and save this shit? I need Fiona Goode or Madam LaLaurie to show up and wipe all of these assholes out.