Welcome back, American Horror Story fans. Tonight's premiere was startling but it definitely did not disappoint. In one episode we were introduced to murderers, schemers, sexual deviants, and spoiled brats, just to name a few. We were treated(?) to blood, gore, and torture that would make last season's Madam LaLaurie beam with pride. Freak Show's tone, however, is far more dark than Coven, and the returning actors and actresses once again have challenging material to work with. Here's what we learned tonight: In The Beginning...
We find ourselves in Jupiter, Florida in 1952 where Bill the Milkman is checking in on a customer who has a collection of unopened milk bottles on her front porch. He wanders through the house and finds the old woman lying on the kitchen floor in a puddle of blood. He then proceeds to search the house with a rolling pin. Really? I mean, there is blood everywhere. What the hell is Bill going to do with a rolling pin? Maybe calling the cops would be the next logical step? Or perhaps getting out of the house as fast as possible should be considered here? Nope. Bill the Milkman is brave and he's totally approaching the closet that's whispering at him. The look on his face when he opens the door tells me that the rolling pin is probably useless.
-------------------
Two Heads Are Better Than One?
A woman with decently painted toenails is rushed into an operating room. The nurse pushing the stretcher leaves the room and promptly vomits in a trash can. Could it really be that bad? The patient's x-rays reveal 1 bladder, 3 kidneys, 4 lungs, and 2 hearts. Yeah I could see where one's stomach could be turned by that.
Jessica Lange makes her way through the hospital halls trying to find this strange woman. She passes her business card to one of the volunteers and introduces herself as Fraulein Elsa, promoting her "Cabinet of Curiosities." Elsa manages to snag the volunteer's uniform and is permitted to visit the patient with multiple...well, everything. She encounters Sarah Paulson with two heads, or Dot and Bette, who can communicate to one another with their thoughts. Interesting. Bette is a little on the slow side, making Dot really her caretaker. Elsa cuts right to the chase and asks if the duo has ever had sex because they share only one reproductive system. It's a fair question. I'm curious about how all that would work too. Dot and Bette share some awkward banter regarding masturbation, and I think I might FINALLY enjoy a character (or characters) played by Sarah Paulson in AHS. Woohoo!
-----
Send In The Clowns
Speaking of reproductive systems, a young couple is about to get it on during a picnic. The delicious looking boyfriend heads to his car to get something (so I immediately assume he'll be dead soon), and his girl waits for him on the blanket. Instead of her beau...a dirty, scary, freaky ass clown arrives instead. I would be pissing my pants right about now, but she's only slightly startled. Did I mention dirty, scary and freaky? He has a smile on his face that would make The Joker jealous and has a half torn mask about his head that looks to be ripped in a very bloody way. Ew. He bows and produces some flowers...and then begins to take some wooden juggling batons out of his bag. The boyfriend returns just as the girl starts to realize she should be pissing her pants, and the freaky ass clown clobbers them both in the head with the batons. He then proceeds to stab the shit out of the boyfriend with scissors. She gets up to run but I'm pretty sure she has zero chance of escaping the killer.
We later see the home of Jeffrey and Mildred Buckman. As Jeffrey gets up in the middle of the night to investigate a noise, the freaky ass clown slips into the bedroom and stabs away at Mildred with the scissors. We hear on the radio that Jeffrey is a victim of the bloodbath too and Troy, their 8 year old son, is missing. Cut to a broken down, dirty bus in the woods where Troy and the unlucky girlfriend are held hostage. The freaky ass clown appears with a little toy clown (overkill?) and proceeds to make balloon animals. Well...almost. The balloon pops, the youngins scream, and the clown goes ballistic and breaks a whole bunch of stuff on the bus. I can't figure him out.
This disgusting creature, we learn, is Twisty the Clown. Twisty, yeah, no kidding. Even Pennywise would be in way over his head here. I'd take "They floooooat. They all flooooat." over the shit this clown is doing any day.
We later see the home of Jeffrey and Mildred Buckman. As Jeffrey gets up in the middle of the night to investigate a noise, the freaky ass clown slips into the bedroom and stabs away at Mildred with the scissors. We hear on the radio that Jeffrey is a victim of the bloodbath too and Troy, their 8 year old son, is missing. Cut to a broken down, dirty bus in the woods where Troy and the unlucky girlfriend are held hostage. The freaky ass clown appears with a little toy clown (overkill?) and proceeds to make balloon animals. Well...almost. The balloon pops, the youngins scream, and the clown goes ballistic and breaks a whole bunch of stuff on the bus. I can't figure him out.This disgusting creature, we learn, is Twisty the Clown. Twisty, yeah, no kidding. Even Pennywise would be in way over his head here. I'd take "They floooooat. They all flooooat." over the shit this clown is doing any day.
----------
What's Your Pleasure?
On a much more lighter note, we join a living room full of disgruntled housewives who don't seem to be getting their worlds rocked as often as they'd like. A woman walks out of the adjacent hallway with an "I just got laid" smile on her face and I wonder if this is a vibrator party or something. The hostess has a surprise hidden in her back bedroom to help with the women's, um, needs...and that surprise is returning cast member Evan Peters and his oddly shaped hands. His name is Jimmy Darling this season and he is quite the ladies man. Seems his deformity makes him very popular with otherwise unsatisfied women, and I can imagine he's left many happy customers behind in each town during his travels.
-------------
Come One, Come All
Getting back to Elsa, she is the driving force behind one of the last remaining freak show attractions. She and her special friends are struggling to stay afloat and find a home that will draw an audience. Her landlord wants the show to pack up and get going, but Elsa uses her reproductive system (is this a theme?) to buy her troupe some more time.
Elsa hopes that Bette and Dot are the answer to her troubles and can be the mind-blowing attraction that the Cabinet of Curiosities needs. She seeks to befriend them and earn their trust...beginning with their "tragic story." The twins claim that they witnessed their mother being murdered, but Elsa sees right through them. Bette has a flashback to their mom refusing to take the girls to see Singin' in the Rain, telling them that she won't let them leave the farm. Bette pitches a fit, her mom leans forward and slaps her, and Bette kills her mom with a knife. Dot does nothing to prevent any of this and later stabs Bette (well, herself really) with scissors as punishment, causing them to end up in the hospital. What's the deal with the scissors? Mom, by the way, is the old woman Bill the Milkman found at the opening of the episode. The whispers he heard behind the door were Bette and Dot.
Elsa claims she wants to save the ladies and off they go to the freak show. Bette writes in her diary and expresses all of her excitement for her new surroundings, while Dot writes about her despair in their situation. They meet Jimmy first, followed by Kathy Bates' character (yay!) Ethel, the bearded woman. She is Elsa's right hand and she's also Jimmy's mother. I can't figure out what Ethel's accent means, but she sure knows how to keep people in check. We also see the return of Pepper from season 2 and that makes me very happy.
Before Elsa's dreams of Bette and Dot headlining a show can take flight, a detective finds the twins in their tent and immediately arrests them for murder. Jimmy hears the cries for help and tries to reason with the detective, who says the girls are monsters. Jimmy whistles and the other "monsters" arrive just in time for the detective to get angry and call them all freaks. Well, Jimmy has heard enough and he slits the guy's throat. The group has some family bonding time later....hacking his body to pieces....while Twisty the Clown looks on from afar.
Elsa hopes that Bette and Dot are the answer to her troubles and can be the mind-blowing attraction that the Cabinet of Curiosities needs. She seeks to befriend them and earn their trust...beginning with their "tragic story." The twins claim that they witnessed their mother being murdered, but Elsa sees right through them. Bette has a flashback to their mom refusing to take the girls to see Singin' in the Rain, telling them that she won't let them leave the farm. Bette pitches a fit, her mom leans forward and slaps her, and Bette kills her mom with a knife. Dot does nothing to prevent any of this and later stabs Bette (well, herself really) with scissors as punishment, causing them to end up in the hospital. What's the deal with the scissors? Mom, by the way, is the old woman Bill the Milkman found at the opening of the episode. The whispers he heard behind the door were Bette and Dot.
Elsa claims she wants to save the ladies and off they go to the freak show. Bette writes in her diary and expresses all of her excitement for her new surroundings, while Dot writes about her despair in their situation. They meet Jimmy first, followed by Kathy Bates' character (yay!) Ethel, the bearded woman. She is Elsa's right hand and she's also Jimmy's mother. I can't figure out what Ethel's accent means, but she sure knows how to keep people in check. We also see the return of Pepper from season 2 and that makes me very happy.Before Elsa's dreams of Bette and Dot headlining a show can take flight, a detective finds the twins in their tent and immediately arrests them for murder. Jimmy hears the cries for help and tries to reason with the detective, who says the girls are monsters. Jimmy whistles and the other "monsters" arrive just in time for the detective to get angry and call them all freaks. Well, Jimmy has heard enough and he slits the guy's throat. The group has some family bonding time later....hacking his body to pieces....while Twisty the Clown looks on from afar.
The Main Event
A mother and son buy out the entire first show featuring Bette and Dot. American Horror Story staple Frances Conroy and newcomer Finn Wittrock play Gloria and Dandy Mott, affluent folks who have a fascination with the inhabitants of the Cabinet of Curiosities, ranging from sword swallowers, contortionists, the world's smallest woman, and a singing Elsa. It's quite a spectacle. Gloria and Dandy offer to pay $15,000 for Bette and Dot but the twins have no desire to leave. Elsa says the girls are "one of us," which immediately takes me to the disturbing dinner table scene from Freaks. Disappointed, Gloria and Dandy spew some insults at Elsa and leave.
Elsa and Ethel discuss the evening's performance and Ethel assures Elsa that she deserves all the applause in the world and should become a household name. Elsa listens to some music, takes off her legs....no really...she's apparently an amputee...and calls it a night.
------------------------
The hour and 32 minute premiere ends there and what a premiere it was. While I absolutely enjoyed the humor and sass of season 3, Freak Show has a sinister feel that I'm already thrilled with. We have many weeks ahead and many characters we've yet to meet, but if tonight's introduction is even a fraction of what we will encounter this season, I'm all about a front row seat. 
No comments:
Post a Comment